For so much of my life I chased this idea, or rather 'ideal' of how life ‘should’ be. But I kept coming back to the same thought, ‘surely this can’t be it’. And whilst I would try to convince myself I was on the right path, and that I was getting it right… deep down I knew I wasn’t.
It was this questioning, and a deep knowing that there was more to life that kept me searching. Searching for the truth. Searching for what feels aligned to living the life that I am here to live... a life of purpose, meaning and fulfilment.
I yearned for the feeling that was sometimes experienced as a glimmer, a moment, where everything felt like it was in perfect harmony.
Moments where it felt like I was 'home' with another human being; a deep sense of connection ignited where the world just makes sense being with this person.
Moments where the sky danced with colour, illuminated in all its glory as the sun would rise, and set.
Moments where time felt as if it was standing still, no longer separate but a part of something so much bigger.
Moments of pure joy felt in the simplest of things, laughter spilling over and hurting your sides.
Moments of peace; such stillness within.
Moments of purpose pulsing; the feeling of being alive so right, so expansive.
Moments of free-flowing expression; the feeling of thriving from a sense of achievement, of contribution, and the sweet taste of freedom.
These moments had me seek more.
They were calling to me… they would sing to me, whisper to me, sometimes scream at me; anything to get my attention.
Until I realised these moments aren’t just mere moments, they are innately who we are… these moments are a calling from our soul, to come home.
And yet on our journey home, we get lost. It’s crazy how we swing from feeling lost, then home, then lost once again. And we begin to lose faith, to lose belief, feeling defeated, uncertain, irritated, frustrated, and we fight. We fight by distracting ourselves… from ourselves.
We get busy making a life, creating moments of feel-goods which manifest into addiction – we numb, we push, we pull, we flight. And the fight is within us; not with the world. The world is purely a reflection of our internal fight.
These moments that call are innately who we are.
It is always there. Our essence of greatness is untouched. It is the fight that disconnects us.
To find our way home we must feel what we are feeling, and stop fighting. And to come home, is to admit we are in the fight.
Once we own the fight, it stops owning us.
There are still moments, and days I find myself in the fight.. but when I let go, and I stop fighting, I feel myself coming home. It's not about getting this right or being perfect... it's about knowing the way home.
Home is where we release what is not aligned to who we truly are. Where we allow our light to shine, our magnificence to magnify and our greatness to glow. Where we thrive inside and out.
These moments are not to be chased. Those moments are reminders calling us home… to feel, heal and to create a truly great life.
Ah yes, imagine a life made not from chasing moments, rather as a way of living, inside and out.
“We're all just walking each other home.” - Ram Dass
PS – if you are ready to ‘come home’, a 3-day retreat is soon to be announced in Melbourne. Numbers are limited so get in touch so I can send you the details. A truly great life awaits. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
PPS - Photo by the very talented Vicki at VSTYLE Photography @www.vstyle.com.au
Lara lives in Melbourne Australia.